LAZY SUNDAY

As it turns out, I may not be the only one with this brilliant idea for a diet. I was watching one of the PBS stations that’s always running fundraising campaigns with health related professionals telling you how to either, -- live longer, have better skin, lose weight, get rich or achieve a positive mental attitude, -- when I stumbled on a Doc I’d never seen before.

Had no time to watch his whole spiel, but did catch him saying the following: Drink water, drink green tea, exercise by walking, de- stress and get lots of sleep… and you’ll lose weight. He actually said, if a person simply substituted green tea for coffee, they’d lose ten pounds over the course of six weeks.

I don’t drink coffee, however, I have been adding green tea in place of my morning cup of English breakfast, and it might account for some of my missing four pounds. Hmm…

I actually might be a genius. He has a medical degree and facts and information… I’m just guessing, but several of our premises are very similar. However, he is not blogging – writing it all down – he’s not adding my vitamins, although maybe he is and I just didn’t stay tuned long enough – he says nothing about affirmations and gratitude…and he’s is not a writer on strike. So of course, my diet remains unique and if it’s a huge success, I will send him my tips with my donation to PBS. He already must be successful to be on PBS… so perhaps he’s not interested in my great wisdom and he may not appreciate that I invented this diet as a lazy, overweight striking writer without a degree or patients.

Today I have consumed the following:

Grapefruit, cereal, banana, bit of French toast
M&M’s plain, Entemmen’s pastry, havarti cheese, banana, hard candy
Turkey meatball, marinara sauce, pasta, red wine

More to come… I should say, lately M&M;s seem to be everywhere. My daughter had a sleepover after one of her thirty Bar/Bat Mitzvahs this year so the pastry and French toast were an inevitable result. I want to do a rant on Bar/bat Mitzvahs… but it’s so over the top and so exhausting to even think about, that I’ve even lost my will to rant. I’m having a tough year party wise. My oldest daughter is the year of “sweet sixteen” parties and my middle child the Bar Mitzvah year. Rock and a hard place --move over. It’s all so hideous. My sixteenth birthday, I bought three rolls of chocolate chip cookie dough and had two friends over and we each ate our own roll of cookies dough. It was fabulous. We laughed, we cried, we ate, we were happy. Now, kids are disappointed if they get a Saab instead of Beemer of their SUV isn’t the right kind of hybrid. I thought nothing could be worse than the extravagant indulgence of an over the top Bar Mtizvah, but an over the top sweet sixteen is worse, because there isn’t even a religious, or community, leg to stand on. It’s pure unbridled indulgence of a child – how can it not create monsters. If I had a bazillion dollars tomorrow, I pray I’d have the good sense not to turn my children into spoiled, lazy children who had obnoxious over the top parties.

I am grateful for being a bazillionaire
I am grateful for not letting my kids realize I’m a bazillionaire
I am grateful for my diet
I am grateful for being thin
World peace, amen.


Still raining... exercise tomorrow!